Picture this: You’re standing at the edge of something amazing, a dream job, a great relationship, a life-changing adventure, and instead of leaping, you freeze. Your brain goes into full-on panic mode: What if I fail? What if I look stupid? What if my cat judges me? (Spoiler: she already does.)
Sound familiar? If so, fear might be the toxic BFF you never meant to befriend. And guess what? She’s been robbing you blind. But don’t freak out just yet. Keep reading to find out if fear is sneakily running your life, and, more importantly, how to shut her down for good.
1. You Overthink Everything (Like, Even What to Text Back)
If you’ve ever rewritten a text 57 times and then decided to just not respond at all, you might be dealing with fear-based paralysis. Fear convinces you that one wrong word will lead to total social ruin. Reality check? Most people don’t even notice.
Do this instead: Hit send. Breathe. Realize the world didn’t implode. Repeat.
2. You Say “Yes” When You Mean “No”
You promised yourself you’d stop saying yes to things you hate (looking at you, Karen’s three-hour baby shower). But here you are, agreeing to another soul-draining event, just to avoid conflict. Fear of disappointing people is running the show.
Do this instead: Say no. Then shut up. No excuses, no over-explaining. Just NO. Feels weird at first, but it’s chef’s kiss empowering.
3. You Postpone Happiness for “The Right Time” (Which Never Comes)
“I’ll travel when I have more money.” “I’ll start my business when I feel ready.” News flash: Fear loves keeping you stuck in the “someday” zone.
Do this instead: Take one small, messy, imperfect step TODAY. Future You will thank you.
4. You Stay in Mediocre Situations Because “At Least They’re Safe”
A job that drains your soul. A relationship that’s fine, I guess. Fear convinces you that “meh” is better than taking a risk. But here’s the tea: Playing it safe is the riskiest thing you can do.
Do this instead: Ask yourself, Would I want my best friend to settle for this? If the answer is no, you know what to do.
5. You Avoid Doing Things Alone (Even When You Want To)
You really want to try that cute new café, but going solo? Terrifying. You don’t want to look like a lonely weirdo. But guess what? Nobody’s watching you (except maybe that one old guy in the corner, but he’s harmless).
Do this instead: Go. Order the fancy latte. Be the main character.
6. You’re a Procrastination Queen (And Not in a Cute Way)
That dream project? Still just an idea. Your big goals? Collecting dust. Fear tells you that if you don’t start, you can’t fail. But guess what? Not starting is failing.
Do this instead: Set a ridiculously tiny goal. Five minutes of work. One email. One baby step. The hardest part is starting.
7. You Compare Yourself to Everyone (And Always Come Up Short)
You scroll through Instagram, mentally listing all the ways other girls are thriving while you…are not. Fear turns other people’s success into proof of your failure.
Do this instead: Unfollow, mute, or remind yourself that social media is 90% filters and fake angles.
8. You Let Your Inner Critic Talk Trash to You (And You Believe Her)
Would you let a stranger say, “Wow, you suck at life” and just nod in agreement? No! So why do you let your own brain do it?
Do this instead: Call her out. Literally say, “Shut up, Brenda” (or whatever you name your inner critic). You’re in charge, not her.
9. You Fear Success Almost as Much as Failure
Wait, what? Yep. Sometimes, fear convinces you that if you do succeed, you won’t be able to handle it. So you sabotage yourself before you even get there.
Do this instead: Remind yourself that success is just a series of small, manageable steps. You don’t have to handle everything at once.
10. You Think Confidence is Something You “Either Have or Don’t”
Truth bomb: Confidence isn’t a personality trait. It’s a skill. And fear is lying when she tells you that you’ll never have it.
Do this instead: Act like the confident version of you before you feel like her. Fake it ‘til you make it WORKS.
11. You’re Constantly Waiting for Permission
Who told you that you need someone else’s approval to do what you want? Fear did. And she’s a liar.
Do this instead: Start asking yourself, What would I do if I didn’t care what anyone thought? Then do that.
12. You’re Not Using the One Tool That Could Change Everything
Listen, breaking free from fear isn’t easy, but it IS possible. And the biggest game-changer? Mindset-shifting journaling.
That’s why you NEED the Fearless AF Journal (yes, girl, this is THE moment). Designed to kick fear in the teeth and rewire your brain for confidence, this journal is packed with prompts, exercises, and challenges to get you unstuck fast.
Limited-time offer: Use code BYEFEAR at checkout for 20% off!
The Bottom Line?
Fear has been stealing your joy for long enough. It’s time to take your power back, one bold, slightly scary, but totally worth-it step at a time.
Tell me in the comments: Which fear are you ready to kick to the curb? And don’t forget to grab your Fearless AF Journal before the discount disappears!
