Ladies, let’s be real. We’ve all dated that person. The one who ghosted us after three months of ‘good morning’ texts. The one who thought emotional availability was optional. The one who made us question our sanity while simultaneously making us write 3 AM poetry. Sound familiar?
Well, the problem isn’t just them (annoying, I know). The truth? You attract what you radiate. And if your aura is basically an emotional dumpster fire, then guess what? You’ll keep dating human red flags. So, what’s the fix? Buddhism, baby! The ancient practice of inner peace and not texting your ex when Mercury is in retrograde.
Here’s how you can use Buddhist wisdom to attract a partner who actually deserves you. Yes, that means no more situationships with Chad who “isn’t ready for labels.”
1. Become What You Seek (Yes, You Need to Do the Work)
Buddha once said, “What you think, you become.” Translation: If you keep saying, “All men suck,” congratulations, you’ve manifested a lifetime of disappointment.
Instead of looking for someone to complete you (ugh, so 2005), focus on becoming the kind of person you’d want to date. Want someone kind? Be kind. Want someone stable? Work on your own stability. Want someone who won’t leave you on read? Girl, maybe check your own texting habits first.
2. Detach from the Outcome (aka Stop Acting Desperate)
Ever noticed how the minute you stop caring, people suddenly want you? That’s because desperate energy repels, while confident, “I’m good either way” energy attracts.
Buddhism teaches non-attachment, a fancy way of saying: Don’t hinge your entire existence on whether your crush texts you back. Focus on living your best life, and the right person will naturally gravitate toward you. (Also, you won’t be that girl refreshing his Instagram story views every five seconds.)
3. Master the Art of Presence (Because Overthinking Ruins Everything)
Picture this: You’re on a first date, and instead of enjoying the moment, your brain is already planning your wedding colors and wondering if he looks like a good dad.
STOP.
Buddhism is all about being present. Instead of obsessing over the future or past (we’re looking at you, overthinkers), focus on now. Is he kind? Is the conversation good? Does he know that deodorant exists? Staying present will keep you from projecting fairytales onto someone who barely deserves a second date.
4. Drop the Ego (Your Checklist is Sabotaging You)
We all have the list: “He has to be 6’2, make six figures, have the emotional intelligence of a therapist, and own a dog.” But real talk? The universe doesn’t care about your shallow demands.
Buddhist wisdom says to let go of ego-based desires. Instead of a checklist, focus on how someone makes you feel. Do they bring you peace? Do they respect you? Do they laugh at your bad jokes? That is what matters. (Bonus: This also increases your dating pool beyond gym bros named Tyler.)
5. Practice Loving-Kindness (Even Toward Your Ex… Kinda)
Holding onto resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to suffer. That’s why Buddhist teachings emphasize loving-kindness, which, in modern terms, means stop cyberstalking your ex and wishing bad things upon their new relationship.
Forgive, release, and move on. This doesn’t mean texting “I hope you’re doing well” (DO NOT). It means genuinely letting go of bitterness so you can make space for love that doesn’t come with emotional trauma.
6. Embrace Impermanence (Because Nothing Lasts Forever, and That’s OK)
Relationships change. People grow. And sometimes, things don’t work out. Instead of spiraling into despair when someone exits your life, remember that impermanence is part of Buddhism (and, like, life in general).
Love fully, but don’t cling. Appreciate the time you had with someone, and if it ends, grieve and move forward. The sooner you accept that nothing is forever, the easier it will be to welcome new (better) love when it arrives.
7. Find Joy in Solitude (Because You Are Enough)
Here’s the plot twist: You don’t actually need a partner to be happy. Shocking, right?
Buddhism teaches the value of contentment with oneself. If the thought of being alone terrifies you, that’s a sign you need to lean into it. Learn to enjoy your own company, take yourself on dates, and realize that you are the main character.
When you’re genuinely happy alone, you stop settling. And that is when the right person finally shows up.
Final Thoughts: Zen Your Way Into Love
Attracting the right partner isn’t about playing games, manipulating, or lowering your standards. It’s about aligning with the kind of love you want by embodying it first.
So, meditate, heal, and stop texting men who only reply when they’re bored. Your future self will thank you.
