Ladies, let’s be real. Love is basically a rollercoaster—except there’s no safety harness, and sometimes it feels like you’re plummeting at full speed into emotional chaos. Whether you’re navigating the talking stage (aka purgatory), healing from a heartbreak (been there), or rolling your eyes at your boyfriend’s inability to text back (seriously, what’s he doing?), I see you. And I’ve got you.
Here are four brutal but life-changing relationship lessons that will turn you into an unbreakable queen. Buckle up.
1. People Treat You How You Allow Them To
Oof. Read that again.
If you let someone cancel plans last minute and just giggle like it’s cute? They’ll do it again. If you let a guy “forget” to text you back for three days, then accept his weak “been busy” excuse? Guess what—he’ll keep forgetting. People push boundaries when they know they can.
The Fix:
Start enforcing your standards yesterday. If something bothers you, speak up. If someone’s behavior makes you feel unimportant, walk away. You are not a doormat. You are the whole damn castle.
2. If They Wanted To, They Would
Ah yes, the lesson that hurts like a fresh breakup playlist. Let’s call it what it is: If someone truly cares about you, they will show you. No overanalyzing, no mixed signals, no weird “maybe he’s just busy” excuses. If they wanted to, they would.
Remember that guy who took three business days to reply but somehow had time to post memes? Or the one who “wasn’t ready for a relationship” but was very ready to pursue someone new two weeks later? Girl, the signs were there.
The Fix:
Instead of making excuses for someone’s half-hearted effort, take it for what it is: a lack of interest. Don’t waste your energy decoding texts when someone else would be sending you good morning messages without you even asking.
3. Love Shouldn’t Feel Like a Full-Time Job (Without Pay)
Relationships require effort, but they shouldn’t feel like you’re climbing Mount Everest while he coasts on a scooter. If you constantly feel exhausted, like you’re dragging the relationship along, that’s not love—it’s an unpaid internship.
The Fix:
A healthy relationship is mutual. Both people should be showing up, investing time, and making things work. If you’re always the one fixing, chasing, or compromising, it’s time to clock out and quit that job.
4. You Are Not Hard to Love
Let’s end with a reality check: You are not “too much.” You are not “asking for too much.” You are not “hard to love.” The right person will love you without making you feel like you have to shrink yourself.
The Fix:
Never settle for someone who makes you feel like you have to earn their love. The right one will see your worth and meet you where you are. And if someone ever tells you you’re “too much,” just smile and say, “Then go find less.”
Final Thoughts:
Relationships will test you, but they shouldn’t break you. Every lesson, every heartbreak, every cringe-worthy mistake (yes, even the ones involving desperate 3 AM texts) is shaping you into the unstoppable force you were always meant to be. So take these lessons, hold your head high, and never forget: You deserve the love you give to others.
Now go forth and be the queen you were born to be.
